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British top 10 funnies jokes: doctor who fans will laugh.

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    British top 10 funnies jokes: doctor who fans will laugh.

    Rob Auton - "I heard a rumour that Cadbury is bringing out an oriental chocolate bar. Could be a Chinese Wispa."
    Alex Horne - "I used to work in a shoe-recycling shop. It was sole-destroying."
    Alfie Moore - "I'm in a same-sex marriage... the sex is always the same."
    Tim Vine - "My friend told me he was going to a fancy dress party as an Italian island. I said to him 'Don't be Sicily'."
    Gary Delaney - "I can give you the cause of anaphylactic shock in a nutshell."
    Phil Wang - "The Pope is a lot like Doctor Who. He never dies, just keeps being replaced by white men."
    Marcus Brigstocke - "You know you are fat when you hug a child and it gets lost."
    Liam Williams - "The universe implodes. No matter."
    Bobby Mair - "I was adopted at birth and have never met my mum. That makes it very difficult to enjoy any lapdance."
    Chris Coltrane - "The good thing about lending someone your time machine is that you basically get it back immediately."

    #2
    Fringe Festival?

    Comment


      #3
      I think that is what it was from . It was on the BBC

      Comment


        #4
        He has a point about the lap dance.
        [COLOR="#008080"][/COLOR][SIZE="5"][COLOR="LightBlue"][B]Not everything that counts on the battlefield is countable.[/B][/COLOR][/SIZE]

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          #5
          And I thought I had an understanding of British humor. I was wrong. They have an obsession with simple puns. Thinking they're clever.

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            #6
            Originally posted by K PhaNTOM View Post
            And I thought I had an understanding of British humor. I was wrong. They have an obsession with simple puns. Thinking they're clever.
            These are simple one liners taken from their main routines at the Fringe Festival. All comedians have them.

            British humor is the best humor.

            Get yourself on Youtube and watch some David Mitchell, Michael Mcintyre and Dara O'Briain. The last one is Irish, but close enough.

            PS. I imagine you'd love QI and Would I Lie To You, K.

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              #7
              Originally posted by juneau View Post
              These are simple one liners taken from their main routines at the Fringe Festival. All comedians have them.

              British humor is the best humor.

              Get yourself on Youtube and watch some David Mitchell, Michael Mcintyre and Dara O'Briain. The last one is Irish, but close enough.

              PS. I imagine you'd love QI and Would I Lie To You, K.
              Seen every episode of Qi and would I lie to you. Not to mention "Not Going out" (Boy, that went down hill) and most of the things with Jimmy Carr in... Big Fat Quiz and what not. All stand up from Dara, Frankie Boyle, and Mock the Week in general. Also subbed to DavidMitchell's Soapbox on youtube and watched him on Have I got News for You. Along with every single episode of Top Gear... at least twice. I just don't think these one liners fairly represent the vulgar humour scene. Jokes about "special kids" or "dead babies." are more my kind.

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                #8
                Originally posted by K PhaNTOM View Post
                Seen every episode of Qi and would I lie to you. Not to mention "Not Going out" (Boy, that went down hill) and most of the things with Jimmy Carr in... Big Fat Quiz and what not. All stand up from Dara, Frankie Boyle, and Mock the Week in general. Also subbed to DavidMitchell's Soapbox on youtube and watched him on Have I got News for You. Along with every single episode of Top Gear... at least twice. I just don't think these one liners fairly represent the vulgar humour scene. Jokes about "special kids" or "dead babies." are more my kind.
                No wonder you like Frankie Boyle then lol.

                Have you watched Never Mind the Buzzcocks? That's another good one.

                Quite surprised you watch so much UK comedy tbh. Is the US offerings that bad?

                Comment


                  #9
                  Originally posted by juneau View Post
                  No wonder you like Frankie Boyle then lol.

                  Have you watched Never Mind the Buzzcocks? That's another good one.

                  Quite surprised you watch so much UK comedy tbh. Is the US offerings that bad?
                  American comedy is very careful. All the jokes are PG13. That isn't at all funny to me. As simple as the simpsons and Family guy are, they are the most hardcore of all of them. Which is pathetic considering the things that comedians say on public British television. And I have seen Never Mind the Buzzcocks but only the seasons from Simon Amstell onwards.

                  "Things that the queen would say..."

                  Frankie Boyle: "I am now so old, my pu**y is haunted." (which even got him in hot water in England lol)

                  The problem with American television is that its run by their advertisers. So you can't make fun of WalMart when half the commercials on a channel are paid by them. The same reason Top Gear USA is rubbish compared to the real top gear. They can't say any car is bad because all cars sent to them are by advertisers. Jeremy Clarkson wouldn't survive here. I remember Clarkson once describing the ride on a Porsche as "It would be more comfortable if I was dragged behind this car... on my chin."

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                    #10
                    Yeah, we can get away with more. Well, a lot more in most cases.

                    I wouldn't change it for the world.

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