Bit of an apology.

[juneau]

It may have come to peoples attention, especially the longer standing members, that I don't really spend much time with the community anymore like Im once did, especially gaming. I post a few things every now and then to pass the time, but my posts are mainly to do just that. Pass the time.

Over the past few months I've been slowly digging a hole for myself emotionally and mentally that really came to a head last night. When you say things like "sometimes I wish the medication would fail" you know something is wrong.

Nothing much makes me happy anymore, and that is no way to live your life. There is always light at the end of the tunnel, but i just need a little help to see it.

After a long and teary talk with my GF I've finally opened up and decided that I need help, and after a recent phone call with my trials nurses at the hospital I'm doing just that. Time to add psychology appts to my busy hospital schedule.

I've just come to the conslusion that this thread would appear to be a bit 'attention whorey', but I can assure you it's not. I just believe that my friends should know, no matter how distant and virtual they might be.

<< hopefully me very soon, << and this gone forever.

[WalkinTarget]

Ughh, no need to apologize to any of us for dealing with health issues that you are experiencing. Physical health is one thing, mental health is another .. if you have neither in abundance I fully understand why life has become a challenge now more than ever. I'm not good at dealing with these things on a personal level, but deep down inside I offer prayers, thoughts, moral support ... whatever I can to help someone out .. I just wish I could offer more in the way of communication.

I'm hoping the visits to the couch go well for you ... they can raise even more questions than they answer initially, as you question many of your own decisions, but gut it out, make the most of it and hope for brighter days ahead. Just do me a favor and know that we collectively value you as a friend, even if you fail to see why at times.

[goldenfooler]

I am with walkingtarget here. Also if you can't try to be an attention whore with your family here, where can you be?
Plus your battling the physical as well as the mental. Thats hard.I am not sure how open it is in England (stiff upper lip and all), but in the USA its getting alot easier to go and not get stigmatized. Only when you notice you are screaming for help will you be able to help yourself.

That being said going to talk to anyone who can help is great. I go twice a week for several years now. I would never be in the state of mind that you could find me in 8 years ago. Not to say I don't still have problems.

I hope much happiness on you.

[Apache Warrior]

No one can shoulder their health burdens alone and stay sane. Poor health puts both a physical strain and a mental strain on anyone. Suffering alone is not healthy. Do not ask me how I know this. I am glad you have opened up to your GF. She is also affected to a degree by your health issues to since she obviously cares about you a great deal. Recognizing you need the help is the most important step in getting better Juneau. And remember we are here for you also, when you need us.
Apache

[Rand{CLR}]

Glad to see you recognized a problem like this one in time to get the right kind of help. Good luck mate!

Keep us in the loop.

-Rand

[Qicmee]

Best wishes on the road ahead. Takes a smart person to realize that having a reason to be sad is different from feeling down all the time. I hope the doctor considers whether this might be your body's reaction to a medication (when did it get worse?). All medications have side-effects; some are worse.

[Trooper110]

Take care and get yourself all worked out juneau, first step is realizing there is any problems and then you just gotta work out your own path to fixing them.

[Jeffro]

You dah man juneau!!!

[K PhaNTOM]

Just remember that I will always love you! Actually, that might be why you're so depressed.

[goldenfooler]

Just remember that I will always love you! Actually, that might be why you're so depressed.

I think that might be phantoms way of saying that he does care.

[Slaughter]

Not a whole lot to add that hasn't already been said. It is fantastic that you've recognized an issue and have properly chosen to get help with it. It really doesn't get better than that, as the starting point of the road to recovery. Best wishes! I know you can get it all sorted out and be healthy.

And like you, I don't play here but continue to visit and post for the same reasons that you do. I'm more of the sci-fi type of gamer (Quake, the Unreals and more recently Tribes:Ascend) rather than military games. Probably because I come from a military family! (USMC - Dad retired as a Colonel back in 73).

[Duke{CLR}]

Hang in there Juneau, my wife runs several psychological programs and helps all types of people everyday. Being with her for 15 years has given me an appreciation for the work they do and a realization that everybody could probably use a shrink at some point. It is no different then treating a physical problem, if it hurts seek a professional. You will be fine.

I have also hit a gaming block in my life so I only stop by to catch up on all my gaming buddies so I'm glad you were able to post this so we can all send some positive thoughts your way.

An after re reading the title the is absolutely need to apologize.

[JohnyRico]

No deep words of wisdom for you, just hopes and prayers that you start feeling better. And don't worry about being a whore. There's only one here and we all know who that is.

[K PhaNTOM]

No deep words of wisdom for you, just hopes and prayers that you start feeling better. And don't worry about being a whore. There's only one here and we all know who that is.

*wink*golden*wink*

[FrOgM]

Get well soon brother...get your head right so you can get your body right ....yoru pal frog